Tag Archives: communication

Charisma, Part 3 – Confidence

Another vital element of charisma is confidence. Charismatic people tend to be highly confident. After all, if you don’t seem sure of yourself, it’s pretty hard for anyone else to be sure of. Especially when you’re initiating contact or trying to sell anything directly as a person, how comfortable your prospects are with you

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Passion drives competence

is usually more important even than price. For many companies and individuals price is usually about #6 on the list of priorities. Elite clients in particular don’t trust cheap. They also don’t trust insecure.

When you’re confident in what you have to say and what you have to offer, it’s easier to inspire others to be confident in it, too. Some questions that may help you clarify where you might be lacking confidence in communicating with others include:

  • How confident am I about what I’m trying to communicate?
  • Why does what I’m communicating matter to me?
  • Why should it matter to anyone else?
  • If I were 100% confident about this, how would I act?

One of the key factors in being confident is competence. If someone were to ask me to give a speech on composing Latin jazz for large orchestras, I’d be totally lost. On the other hand, if I’m asked to speak on comic art, sales, or leadership, I’d be as comfortable as a pig in mud.

Another factor is passion. Even some of the most bashful, nervous types come to life when they start talking about their passion. Is there such a thing as over-enthusiasm? Sure, but my personal philosophy with regard to most things is that I’d rather beg for forgiveness than ask for permission, and when it comes to enthusiasm, it’s safer to go a little overboard than it is to show up with the personality of a handle. Now, I’m not saying to fake it, but rather to let your passion for what you’re doing come out.

Indeed, passion often drives competence. When I sustained a bad frostbite of my drawing hand and couldn’t even write my name, much less draw, my passion for my art led me to practice with thicker markers and crayons, then a thickly padded ball point pen for weeks. In the end, the art at Darkfell.com improved by leaps and bounds.

I won’t ask how bad do you want it, but rather, ‘How much do you love it?’


P.S. Here are some of my other articles on boosting your confidence:

Quick Tips to Boost Your Confidence

The James Bond Walk

The Power of a Good Handshake

The Power of a Genuine Smile

5 Ways to Communicate well and Earn Trust

Trust isn’t just earned, it’s invested. However, to get someone to invest a little trust in you so that you can earn the rest, you must be able to communicate well. Some things that will help this process:

1. Have something good to say. This doesn’t just apply to industry knowledge. Be prepared to add value to the lives of others with your words. Have you ever known someone whose words always seem to bring life, peace, joy, and wisdom into a situation? Have you noticed that such people are usually trusted? There’s a reason for that. The value of their words inspires trust.

2. Say it Well. Study the great communicators of different  eras. You don’t have to imitate them, but you will learn from them. All great leaders are great communicators. You can’t lead unless you can effectively present ideas and inspire others to partake of those ideas.

3. Learn to trust the truth. I’m a firm believer in the seemingly lost art of integrity. Truth is tremendously powerful, and much lower maintenance than deception.

4. Learn to read your audience. Great communicators learn to understand what their audience needs. Too often we’re so focused on what we have to say that we fail to realize that what we intend to say isn’t what the people around us need.

5. Seek to serve rather than to impress. Let your marketing be impressive. When it’s time to interact with clients, customers, friends and relations, impressing them does not good except maybe for your ego. The word ‘deserve’ is made up of the Latin prefix de, which signifies ‘of’ or ‘from.’ Thus, if you want to deserve trust, you must serve and serve well.

The power of a good handshake

Believe it or not, your handshake can make or break your first impression on people you meet, both in business and everyday life. A limp or feeble handshake can make you seem as though you lack confidence, and crushing grip can come across as hostile or immature. A good, firm handshake will communicate confidence, trust, and sincere regard for and interest in the other person. Continue reading

19 Tips for a good presentation

1. Be entertaining

Every speech or presentation ought to be entertaining as well as informative. Now, I’m not saying you need to show up dressed as Batman. However, unlike written forms of communication, people expect some emotional connection. Even if your material is fascinating to you, it might need some help to captivate your audience. Continue reading